Shadows and Streetlights
by tartan-slippers
Summary: Bit of fluff prompted by the Teacher's Lounge Fluff Project. Wolfstar one-shot.


It was that short, sweet time of day when the streets of London were lit with both the orange buzz of warming streetlights and the hazy half-light that lingers after a summer sunset. The rush hour traffic had died down, and in the distance the sounds of sirens and church bells merged to form the music that characterised the city.

The candles were lit inside the Leaky Cauldron, framing the grubby windows and giving the pub a more welcoming air than it's dreary exterior did during the daytime hours. Remus Lupin hesitated outside, reluctant to lose the last moments of the day and accept its end. This was the last day of the dying summer and the end of his internship at the _Daily Prophet_ ; it was the last summer holiday he would ever have, and he felt keenly the ending of something he couldn't name.

He took a bracing breath and pushed open the heavy wooden door, letting it fall closed behind him like that part of his life. And then, three steps into the mildly oppressive warmth of the busy pub, he stopped dead. His eyes lit up, and his lips were pulled into an unintentional smile. There, perched on a bar stool, Firewhisky in hand and chatting animatedly to a starstruck barmaid, was a dark haired man with a roguish smile and long legs that Remus knew went on for miles. He wore a battered leather jacket over a thin, over-washed Sex Pistols tshirt, and Remus noticed that his shoulders had broadened over the weeks he hadn't seen him.

Sirius Black turned his head and met Remus' gaze, the corner of his mouth twitching up into a smile that felt like a shared secret.

Remus' limbs felt suddenly weak as he crossed the infinite distance between them, slipping on the empty barstool beside him without quite being able to meet that piercing gaze again.

"Well, this man right here definitely needs an Ogden's, by the look of him," Sirius told the barmaid, and she smiled invitingly before turning towards the bottles lined up behind the bar.

No, Remus thought to himself, you're enough of a drug as it is.

Sirius Black had been Remus' weakness for as long as he could remember. Whilst James had been the first person to try to befriend Remus, Sirius had been the first person who had smiled at him like he was his favourite person. Remus knew that Sirius had that effect on everyone - he had natural confidence and charisma that made him a favourite of McGonagall's despite the trouble he was invariably at the centre of - but it didn't stop his stomach lurching every time the corner of Sirius' mouth curved up into that secret smile. He could deny that smile nothing; it made him a terrible choice as a prefect, being completely unable to confront any rule-breaking by the worst rule-breaker of them all.

"Honestly though, mate," Sirius said in a quieter voice, "you look like crap. You're not due to look that wobbly for another two weeks."

Remus gave a half-hearted laugh as the barmaid handed him a glass of Firewhisky.

"I'm fine, I'm fine," he said briskly, but Sirius raised one elegantly arched brow disbelievingly.

"Moony, you're about as fine as a Crup in a dragon's den. Is it the internship?"

Remus bit his lip, and Sirius quickly looked away from his friend's face.

"Sort of," Remus admitted, "I mean, not the internship itself, more the fact that it's over. That's us going into our final year at Hogwarts now, and it's hitting me that everything is going to change."

"What do you mean?" Sirius snorted, "Things won't change at all. We'll just all hang out at Godric's Hollow instead."

"Yes, they will," Remus said sadly, looking pensively into the amber liquid he swirled absentmindedly in his glass, "The headlines have been getting worse and worse. I've seen so many names and numbers pass over my desk this summer, all dead. Once we leave Hogwarts, we won't be safe any more. It'll be like… like growing up. Having to deal with the real world."

Sirius' gaze darkened.

"There might be a lot of dark things going on outside of Hogwarts - in Hogwarts itself even - but that doesn't mean anything has to change with _us_. James, Peter… you and me."

Remus' breath caught, and he froze. Had Sirius finally realised that his friend saw him as more than a friend? Shame made his pale cheeks flare with splotches of scarlet. Sirius treating Remus as he did the endless girls who sighed over him was the last thing he wanted.

"I'd never want anything to change with us. All of us. Friendship is too important for that," Remus said, his voice strained.

Sirius didn't reply. When Remus looked up, he saw his friend's face tipped forward, staring hard at the wood on the bar top, his long dark hair falling to partially cover his face. But it didn't hide the tightening of Sirius' mouth.

All Remus ever wanted was that mouth to smile.

"Hey, how about we go and do something? Celebrate the end of my internship and the start of our last year at Hogwarts?" he suggested. It was usually Sirius or James that would suggest a night out and Remus who preferred the quiet and peace, but he'd do anything for that smile.

Sirius stayed silent for a long moment, his expression concealed. How Remus longed to reach out and brush that hair back, to murmur soft comforts and kiss that mouth until he felt the smile return.

"I think I'm just going to head back to Godric's Hollow," he said finally, looking up and waving to the barmaid for the tab.

Remus couldn't hide his disappointment in time.

"Oh."

Sirius' gaze finally met his, a quizzical look on his face. He looked into Remus' eyes as though he could read something there, something intriguing that slowly set a smile blossoming on his handsome face.

"But you could walk me down the street a bit? I need to catch the Knight Bus - still haven't quite mastered Apparition, and the last thing I want is to turn up at home with no nose and terrify old Prongs."

Remus felt his grin spread to match Sirius'. There was something so infectious about his happiness; it was more magical than anything he had ever seen at Hogwarts.

Sirius paid for their drinks, and held the door open for Remus with a grin as they left. Outside, the night had fully drawn in - everything was lit in yellow and orange, with a brooding purple sky overhead. The stars were always hard to see in London, but there was one very bright star twinkling overhead, and the sight of it drew the corners of Remus' mouth up in a familiar way.

The two boys strolled down the street together, walking so closely that their arms brushed every now and then. They made an odd pair: Sirius with his artfully battered Muggle clothes and confident strut, and Remus in what once would have been a smart set of brown robes that were now patched in several places and fraying at the hems, and his shoulders stooped as though the weight of the world rested on them.

The Knight Bus could be summoned from any street: they both knew it. But neither said a word as they continued to wander down the road between the pools of orange light that lit the world.

At last, Sirius slowed to a halt. Remus stopped, looking up at his friend with a serious expression. Please, he prayed to whichever god listened, please don't let anything change. Please don't let my feelings change our friendship.

Sirius looked at the ground, kicking his shoe awkwardly against the pavement.

"I - I'm not good at this stuff, you know?" he said, his voice quiet and slightly hoarse.

"The girls at school - it's fine, it means nothing, _they_ mean nothing, and mostly I just like the attention. I've never really wanted much more than that, but somehow I feel like it's the only thing I have that James doesn't, and whilst I love him like a brother it made me feel like I was good at something, you know? Good at making people like me, love me."

He hesitated, both hands going to his face, and then dropping to fist in the bottom of his tshirt.

"With you, it's different."

Remus' heart was racing, and his stomach felt like it was hitting the back of his tongue.

"I've never had to force a smile on my face for you. Even when I've been at my most black… my most _Black…_ you still looked at me like I was the best person you knew. And it made me _want_ to be."

Sirius looked right into Remus' eyes, his face half bathed in orange light, and half in shadow. He reached out a hand to draw out Remus' own, and he took it, stroking the trembling fingers with his own.

"This summer, with you at the _Prophet_ , it's been like a limb is missing. I keep turning round to speak to you and you aren't there. I want to ask you questions, to share my experiences with you, to hear your opinions and your calm advice, and when you aren't there I just feel like life is on hold. And you're right - things will change next year. It won't be the same. And I want to make the most of the time I have with you."

Remus couldn't suppress the hope that was rising in him. This was more than he could have dreamed. Could the boy that everybody wanted, the boy that lit up a room whenever he entered it, the boy who loved and hated with so much fire that he burned bright enough to blind Remus to everyone else, actually want the mousy boy with the beast inside?

Remus slowly reached out with one trembling hand, and slowly touched Sirius' cheek. Sirius closed his eyes, leaning into Remus' touch, and a soft sigh escaped his full lips. Remus hand brushed lightly across his face, then slid behind his neck, and pulled the taller boy down into a kiss.

At first it was soft, like the touch of a butterfly's wings, and lingered. Then the kiss deepened, growing hungrier and more intense, and Sirius' teeth nipped playfully at Remus' lower lip drawing out a groan. Remus' other arm slipped around Sirius' neck, and Sirius' hands were at Remus' narrow waist. They clung to each other, their bodies melding together as though they would never part again.

But they did. Slowly, their kisses lost their intensity, growing sweeter and lighter before finally drawing apart. Their eyes met, and smiles broke out on both faces like a reflection.

"You know," Remus said, his heart racing and as light as horses' wings, "this really isn't the end after all."


End file.
